Real vs Fake

When someone asks you, “who are you?” what do you say? Do you answer with an occupation? A skill? A hobby? All of those things make up who you are, and they are okay answers, right? But they are not WHO you ARE. You are a lot of things, I honestly don’t know a good answer. If someone asked me, who are you. I think I would answer with my name. I’m Kaitlyn. No, but, who are you? I’m Kaitlyn, I am more complicated than you probably have the time or care to hear about. But maybe living genuinely is giving a genuine answer. I am me. It actually makes me think of Guardians of the Galaxy, of Groot. I am Groot. Think of all the skills and wisdom you possess and how you use those things to forge WHO are you ARE. It’s not that you are a mom, a Californian, a chef. It’s that you are a disciplined, loving, chef from California who has kids and is passionate about what you do and is honest but sometimes judgmental and emotional. The good and the bad. It’s all great, because it’s you. And you recognize yourself when you look into the mirror. 

 

Your fictional self… this is who the world has made you into. The world asks A LOT of women, it really gets my blood pumping and not in a good way, to be honest. We essentially bear the burden of the world on our shoulders, and we do it with grace and ease (except when you look behind the curtain) This is your fictional self, the face you put on for the world. You feel like you cannot show your true emotions, but I am here to tell you, you can. You are allowed to feel overwhelmed, stressed, emotional, happy, sad, hell you can even feel selfish sometimes. You can. Friends and family want you to fill specific roles, and we are more than happy to jump on those roles because we are women, and we feel like we can do everything (which we can) but NOT when it isn’t in line with your AUTHENTIC self. Okay? 

 

I find that I actually live with my authentic self, however, I want to fully embrace this. I sometimes am my fictional self when I am on social media or on any platform that involves acquaintances. I grew up in Christian school, and while I do NOT want to bring religion into this today, it did shape how I behave. What I mean is this, I could not be my authentic self at school for 13 years. I had to be my fictional self, day in and day out. It took a lot of painful searching to find my authentic self and hold onto her after high school. I have to step away from a place of fear around people that don’t truly know me, if they don’t like, respect, or value my opinion and viewpoint, I have to let that go and be true to myself. I can no longer edit myself to a point where my true feelings aren’t being presented. At the end of the day, this is not going to make any connections. If anything, it will force myself and others to feel disconnected from one another, not because of what I did or did not say, but because I am coming from a place of insincerity.

 

Let’s all focus on who we ARE, not who we are asked to be,